[OUTSIDER] The Seasons Are Changing… Literally!

If you’ve been outside recently, then you know how erratic the weather has been. In the morning you need a winter coat, and by noon you need a tank top. One day it’s almost 80 degrees, the very next day, it’s cold enough to leave your frozens out on the porch. 

With warm, summer-like weather in November and cold and frigid temperatures in April, climate change is dramatically affecting our lives. What are the people in power doing about it?

The U.S. Government has proposed a solution. Changing the names of the seasons! Spring is now Winter, Winter is now Spring. September is now August, December is now November, and March is now February. 

By rearranging the seasons, the weather will now be more normal for the time of year. Freezing March, nope, not anymore! It’s February now, and it’s SUPPOSED to be cold in February. You think it’s too hot for a September day? Well, think again! It’s August, and August is the hot month.

Head of the Climate Change Reaction Committee, Rayner Shine, wholeheartedly agrees with this plan and fully supports it.

“I couldn’t come up with anything better,” says Shine.

So mark your calendars, or rather, throw out your calendars and get some new ones, because new seasons are here to stay!